The Spears Saga of '07

By Liz Feuerbach
If you haven't heard already (and I'm sure you have) Britney Spears' little sister, Jamie Lynn, is pregnant. The 16 year old Nickelodeon star got knocked up by her boyfriend Casey Aldridge, a boy she met in Church, and has decided to go through with the pregnancy. Britney better watch her back or else Jamie Lynn might steal the Miss Trash USA crown right from her ratty extension-filled head!

Not to be outdone, Britney has kept up with her antics. Right in time for the holidays Britney skanked it up by reportedly dragging a paparazzi photog to a hotel and sleeping with him until the early morning. Girl, you keep that crown. Not even a teenage pregnancy can steal your spotlight, Brit Brit!

In order to solidify her title as Miss Trash USA we have come up with a few more ways that Britney can steal attention away from Jamie Lynn:
1. Reunite with KFed and collaborate on a romantic duet (think Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey's "Where You Are" circa 1999)
2. Britney has hit just about everyone and everything with her car. It's time to move on to bigger and better vehicles. Girl needs to rent out a helicopter and take out the middle of Rodeo Drive as she attempts to land it.
3. Come out with her own Umbrella line so that the rest of America can attack SUVs whenever they please!
4. Get pregnant by 1 of 2 people: Casey Aldridge or Larry Birkhead. Think of all the possibilities! Note: an appearance on Maury would give her bonus points.

Let us know what you think Britney could do to gain back her title as the biggest train wreck in America!

P.S. - The major gossip blogs are buzzing with news that the father of Jamie Lynn's baby isn't in fact Casey Aldridge's, but rather an older man! As always, we'll let you know what we think if the story develops.

Photo Credit: the fabulous planethiltron.com